Therapy for LGBT/GSM folk
This has taken me a really long time, but I wanted to tell you all about this awesome website.
I’m told by a not small number of people that if you’re into consensual BDSM relationships and polyamory, or have a queer identity in some way, it’s really difficult to find open-minded and accepting therapists who won’t see it as wholly or part of an illness. I know I’ve felt uncomfortable talking about my relationships and sexuality for fear of being judged, so I try generally to make it the first thing I say in order to judge the therapist’s reaction. When I want to talk about my personal issues, the last thing I want is to be trying to judge my therapist, amirite?
If you are in the UK and are an open-minded and non-judgemental therapisty type, or if you are looking for such a one, please go and have a look at Pink Therapy. You can sign up and be added to the UK database so people can find you by location and various other fields. Also if you are in need of accepting and supportive help with stuff, not necessarily LGBT/GSM issues but just someone who won’t think you’re mentally ill just because your partner has a partner who’s into spanking you on the weekends, then you can go and search the database and see who’s in your area and what they’re like and how they can help you.
If you do such a thing, please make sure to tell the therapist(s) you contact that you found them through Pink Therapy, because then it will do well and be recommended to other therapists, and then the database will grow and be more helpful. Winnar.
They’re not listed on Pink Therapy, but for any University of Bristol students reading, I can thoroughly recommend the Student Counselling Service. I went looking to talk about some problems I was having with handling other people’s disapproval, and the therapist I talked to was so supportive, it was almost overwhelming. Also, I confirmed with her that the other therapists would be supportive, including of BDSM.
That is very cool. 🙂
If anyone would like to anonymously recommend accepting and supportive therapists who haven’t yet found Pink Therapy, email me (lotte DOT lodge AT gmail DOT com) and I’ll reply in a comment here.
You could also, if you’re still seeing them, recommend they add themselves to the listings.
Do people need to know about stuff in advance to count? I told my therapist when I found poly, and he hadn’t heard of it in those terms before, but just went “hmmm” briefly (in a friendly tone) and has been entirely and wonderfully supportive since. We have not spoken about bdsm stuff because it’s not really relevant to why I’m there, mind.
I think that works. 🙂 He could be mentioned as “definitely at least okay about polyamory; other stuff unconfirmed” or something!
Now I want a U.S. equivalent. This is fantastic.
I just wanted to add, because it’s a happy story, that I came out as kinky to the aforementioned therapist, after lots of umming and ahing and double-checking what his take on confidentiality was… and he said… “cool.” You know, in the tone that implies “cool story bro. Cake? ” 🙂
That is most excellent! Congratulations! ‘Tis a relief to have people who are open and accepting. 🙂